Word of the Week: FAMILY

The Urban Dictionary defines a family as a group of people, usually of the same blood (but do not have to be), who genuinely love, trust, care about, and look out for each other.

For many years prior to Covid, I sadly neglected my family and friends in the pursuit of more while living in the San Francisco Bay Area.

I spent most of my days and nights working or thinking about work and how to get more clients and more money. Thankfully, I love what I do for work (and don’t really think of it as work) and feel that helping others feel and look their best is my calling from God.

Even though I felt good about serving others through my job, I was out of balance for years because the work never seemed to end and I felt unfulfilled in my relationships. I am sure my family and friends felt unfulfilled also.

In a Tony Robbins workshop, Tony asked us to assess how much time and effort we gave in 3 areas: work, relationships and self – care. At that time it was like 80% work, 10% relationships and 10% self-care.

Although I knew I was out of balance it was tough to see it on paper. I gave most of my energy to my work and little to my family and friends or myself. Tony says, “what you focus on is what you get” and I knew I needed to change my focus if I wanted more balance with my family/friends and self-care.

Awareness is important, but I didn’t quite know how to change my focus.

Although it’s been a challenging couple of years, the Covid pandemic made that shift a bit easier for me. I was forced to shut down my in-person business and went online. Life changed for many of us, given we were no longer able to go into the office. I no longer had to get up at 445 am and slept in till around 7 am. Over time I was able to catch up on sleep that I deprived myself of for about 25 years.

In addition, my business model became simplified by going virtual: much less overhead without a facility, reduced clients, class sessions and employees. Going virtual also allowed me the freedom to work from anywhere in the world, so my family and I decided to move away from the Bay Area to El Dorado Hills.

Given I had lessened my workload, for the first time in my life I was able to focus more on my family and friends, which I now classify as LOVE in the Work-Love-Life Balance Model above. I was also able able to focus more on self-care (LIFE in the model above).

Currently, I am shifting back into more work and doing both virtual coaching and recently started in-person coaching in the El Dorado Hills area. In my new Work-Love-Life Balance Model I would assess myself at 40% work, 35% relationships and 25% self care. I feel this is a good balance that I can live with for a while. I love spending quality time with my family and never want to go back to the life I lived before Covid.

The most important thing in the world is family and love.” – John Wooden

How would you assess your Work-Love-Life Balance?

Send me an email to [email protected] with your percentages for your focus on work, love (relationships) and life (self-care) and with only that information I will be able tell you what is working well in your life and where you need to focus more to achieve balance.

“When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching–they are your family.” – Jim Butcher